October 22, 2004

Sargeant Schultz Speaks

For President: John Kerry

I have heard how you Americans respond to interference in your elections, but please, allow me a moment to be heard.

As you know, in my position as guard here at Stalag 13, I must keep a watchful eye on everything that goes on, much as your president needs to be a watchful eye out for terrorists. In fact, yesterday, my watchful eyes spotted LeBeau making a Crepes Suzette for Colonel Klink. I told him that he would have to allow me to make certain that the Crepes Suzette was properly made, or the Colonel would send me to the Russian Front, and him to the cooler. Actually, the real reason was that I really like LeBeau's Crepe Suzette, so I outwitted LeBeau, and the Crepe Suzette tasted wonderful. Colonel Klink and General Burkhalter were talking about some new secret rocket plane--oops. Forget I said that. I KNOW NOTHING! Anyway, the resistance blew up the plane just yesterday, and I can't for the life of me figure out how that happened--but like John Kerry says, it's just a nuisance anyway.

Anyway, LeBeau's Crepes Suzette got me thinking about this year's presidential election. John Kerry is nuanced and French, like LeBeau's Crepes Suzette. And since I like LeBeau's Crepes Suzette, I will probably like John Kerry too.

So, because of Kerry's nuanced, french foreign policy, I heartily endorse him for President, because he will be as good for your nation as LeBeau's crepe Suzette is for my stomach.

Thank you, and good night.

Part of the TTLB's blogburst.

Posted by John Bono at October 22, 2004 01:10 AM| Link Cosmos

Did a link ask for annoying Registration? Bug me not!

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